posted on Apr 26, 2018


Did you receive an invitation to a bar (boy) or bat (girl) mitzvah (coming of age party that allows a young person to participate as an adult in the church) and are wondering what to expect?

Well, it’s your lucky day because these meaningful experiences are beautiful coming of age celebrations that may create a tear in your eye one minute and get you out on the dance floor the next!

Here at Michele Butler Events, we plan Orlando bar and bat mitzvahs that are designed specially around the boy or girl and his or her guests for a one-of-a-kind event that Wows everyone attending! These parties are not only fun to plan and attend, but they are so special to a young person blossoming into an adult.

Because of this importance in a young person’s life, we make sure to take the utmost care in every detail. But what about those attending? Especially if you’ve never been to one before?

Here are three pieces of advice we have for you so the party stays the talk of the town afterwards – not you:

1. What to wear? When in doubt, go conservative.

So, what does one wear to a bar or bat mitzvah?

Your invitation should provide you with guidance on what to wear. It may state “black tie” or “cocktail attire” or even “resort casual” to provide insight on how fancy the party will be.

However, there are times when an invitation does not provide guidance on what to wear.

No matter if it states in your invitation attire or not, it’s always better to err on the more conservative side.

Keep in mind, you will be attending the synagogue ceremony followed by the party (more than likely). And even though it may seem like the perfect time to don that low cut little black dress and your best dancing shoes, be mindful that it may not be appropriate to show cleavage or too much skin in the synagogue.

There’s a good chance there will be many other young adults in attendance as well, so again, it’s safer to dress in a conservative manner versus feeling uncomfortable in an outfit that may be better suited for a wedding or New Year’s Eve.

2. Not sure what to get? Give Meaningfully.

This is a monumental moment in a young person’s life and your gift should reflect the importance of it. But not to worry! There are simple and easy gifts that regard the significance of the day.

We especially like the ideas posted from Emily Post, such as:

– Star of David Charms or Gifts
– Jewelry
– Books
– Gift Certificate or Money

We also love when a special hand written note is included with gifts that give best wishes and words of encouragement and advice to the young person. This can be the most important and special gift you could give.

3. Not well versed in Jewish culture? Engage the Hosts and Attendees!

Because some of the guests attending may not be part of the Jewish culture, there can be a lot of questions of how to act and what certain ceremony aspects represent. Synagogues can have different expectations and aspects to each ceremony as well, so it can be overwhelming if you’re not well versed!

But what to do if you simply don’t know?

Ask!

Sometimes we can feel embarrassed or uneducated to ask about things we don’t know or understand. However, we’re doing a disservice by not asking and learning!

We find that sometimes guests come to us versus asking the host or hostess of the event – or even a fellow attendee. That’s wonderful – and it’s also the perfect opportunity to meet new people and learn about their culture.

Don’t be afraid to reach out to the host/hostess (mother or father, usually) and ask what to expect, how the ceremony will run, and if there is anything you should be aware of that you don’t know about.

Take this opportunity to grow in your knowledge and immerse yourself in a new culture for the day!

Are you planning a bar or bat mitzvah in the Orlando or Central Florida area and are looking for ideas, organization, coordination, and budgeting for the day? Look no further – that is what we specialize in!

Please call us at (407) 365-4729 or email me at michele@michelebutlerevents.com for us to speak further about your child’s special day and how we can make it fabulous!