I like to think that most of my work days are spent looking through pretty pictures, helping brides select the perfect gown, tasting scrumptious wedding cakes, and high energy brainstorm sessions with talented colleagues. And although those things are part of my job (yeah!), much of my time each day is spent on my laptop answering questions.
Many of the questions I find are ones that are helpful to all couples and wedding professionals, so I am starting a new feature on my blog called: Ask Michele. I’m taking the most seen questions and answering them for you here!
Have one of your own? Email me at email@example.com and I’ll answer if your question is selected!
Here we go!
Celeste, Bride: My fiancé and I are debating between a band and DJ. I would love to book a band, but my fiancé is concerned about cost. What’s your opinion?
Michele: What a great (and important) question! The entertainment selected for your ceremony and reception can set the tone for the entire celebration, but be careful not to break the bank.
Consider the following:
What type of music do we want for the wedding? Do we anticipate dancing and if so, what type of music will our guests most likely dance to or will we require an eclectic mix?
Do we have to have original versions of songs played, or do we enjoy the same songs that can be performed by someone else?
Can we utilize certain band members for the ceremony as well to save on costs?
Is the band available with fewer members at a lower cost?
Determine how important music is to you and your fiancé and then decide at what cost. Do you still want the lush centerpieces and duo plated dinner? Then, a DJ may be a more affordable option for your budget. But, if half of your centerpieces were smaller with different flowers and the duo plate went to a choice of one entree, maybe the band is doable after all. Either way, if you’ve found the right entertainment professional, you and your guests are sure to experience a fabulous time.
Michael, Groom: My fiancé and I had always envisioned a Saturday wedding, but the venue we like is out of our budget. After explaining that to them, they sent us a budget proposal for a Friday wedding. It works for our budget, but will anyone come to a Friday wedding?
Do you have many out of town guests?
If most of your guests are flying in, a Friday wedding may incur them an extra day off of work and could potentially be a hinderance to their RSVP. However, it may also allow them an extra day of fun in Orlando which could be a plus for some!
How important is it that most of your invited guests attend?
If there are people that are on your “must attend” list and you have a big bridal party, you may want to reach out to them to make sure they could be flexible with your date. But remember, this day is about the two of you. Don’t be afraid to make a decision based on what YOU want versus what others want.
On a scale of 1-10, how crucial is this venue?
If you’re site toured out, exhausted all other possibilities, and this is still the perfect place, then it’s time to seriously consider the Friday option. I can’t guarantee everyone will attend, but if it’s where you feel most excited and comfortable to exchange vows, then I encourage you to make a decision that feels right for the both of you.
Jaydine, Bride: My family and I are having a cake war. My mother insists that I serve white cake because not everyone loves chocolate, but chocolate is my and my finance’s favorite. She’s paying for it, what do I do?
Michele: This type of question comes up frequently! Whether cake, flowers, gown, etc. many families have challenges with everyone’s happiness. I see it often!
My biggest piece of advice? It’s all about compromise.
Both of you want to be heard and understood. That doesn’t necessarily mean only one person should “win” and the other feel voiceless. Be open and honest, communicating respectfully ideas on how you can combine your wishes.
Suggest the big layer on the bottom be white cake and the top layer be chocolate. Or, if it all needs to be the same, offer up white cake with chocolate filling. Explain that you appreciate her suggestions and that you are brainstorming ways to incorporate it with your desires.
Keep in mind that if you agree to her paying, she may feel she has some say. It helps to express expectations before accepting her generosity for if you feel adamant that your wishes are most important, it may be best to take care of the costs on your own.
Do you have a question that you’d like Michele to answer? Ask away!
Send your question to firstname.lastname@example.org.